E agora ?
Farto da vida … simplesmente farto
Here I’m again, depressing for a girl that just decided to ignore me. I really liked her, for me it was unique the thing we had, but she just chose another one. We would see each other all the time and if we miss one day, we would talk by the phone. Three times we were “together”, no, there wasn’t sex just lovely-love, but it was special, seriously, it was much bigger then the other “things” I had with other women. Every time we where “together” she would regret being with me, because, her words, she was not ready (you can see why in the other text I wrote), though she would come back for me. The third and last day, it was a nightmare and a relief, because the stress she put in me and the possibility that she chose to be with me. In the end, she left me, she stop talking with me and ignores me, she chose the other one and tossed me away as piece of paper. It hurts so much it really does. Everything I put in the line for here, the work, the trust, the love, everything … nothing simply nothing … my God isn’t merciful. Why, I ask why, how can a person just snap the fingers and forget everything, every word told, every sacrifice made, how … pls tell me.
It hurts so much … why God why
I feel miserable.
Someone told me that history repeated himself and that we should be caution about it.
I’ve met this girl, attractive one, silent, mysterious and more important independent. After we introductions, we started talking like I’ve never done in my life, later on I discover I was wrong about her personality . I’ve found that she liked another, but it’s was problematic love. I told her that I didn’t want to know about that problem, I only wanted to know about her specifically and never to see me as friend or a brother. She told me, her happiness, her tragedy, her fears, her friends even her smile. She was special and I wanted her…
Not long I noted that she didn’t like me, or at least my advances didn’t work.
One special day, we went to a walk, where she confess one of her biggest fears/tragedy … strong girl I thought … in the end of her story we where at her door and we talk more xD … We Kissed … she told me not tell anyone I’ll keep my promess … and kissed more … she asked questions about love and I answer … kiss …she asked if the kiss was important and said yes … and we kissed … she asked what did I think about our relationship and I answer that I liked her … more kisses … She told me that she needed to rearrange her problems with the other man and herself, I told I would wait for her … and we end with a kiss. In that moment I saw her face, her smile … her fake smile, she repent everything, I could see all as I’ve seen before, but I ignored and continued walking. The next day, she said “I’m sry for what I’ve done with you yesterday” … I cried and cursed the gods for everything, my destiny for being so tragic, my life for existing.
Why God, why … not even this you forgive, what more do you have take from me, I’m already in the end of the well, Kill me now, please just do it, I can’t stand this anymore, please…
Cada vez mais rápido … desta vez 3 horas, espectáculo … Fucking kill me …